Friday, January 9, 2009

Say my name, bitch! Say it! *cracking whip noise*

Okay, time to come clean. Against my better judgement, I, um, well, I kind of, uh, ahem, signedupforeharmonyagain. I am such a loser. Unless it actually works out okay, in which case...YAY! I do have to say, this time I've only been matched with one Indian dude. He didn't even have a moustache. I can't believe it.

sigh

Dr. Neil seems to think I would be compatible with Terry, 42, Hillsborough, NC, among other people. In your profile, one of the questions is "what are you most passionate about?" Here is part of Terry's response to that question.

"I am also passionate and can be quite adventuresome and intense when it comes to sexuality and the boudoir."

Say what? Like chain-me-to-a-water-pipe-in-the-basement-with-a-ball-gag-in-my-mouth adventurous? Like my-nipples-hooked-up-to-your-jumper-cables intense? Cuz, I'm not sure that's what Dr Neil had in mind when he asked you that question. Just sayin' is all.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go break Terry's heart.


Kiss the boot of shiny, shiny leather
Shiny leather in the dark
Tongue of thongs, the belt that does await you
Strike, dear mistress, and cure his heart

Severin, severin, speak so slightly
Severin, down on your bended knee
Taste the whip, in love not given lightly
Taste the whip, now plead for me

5 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Hey, I met my husband online, and maybe you can too? And then you can teach him how to sew a button onto his pants.

FoxyMoron said...

Yeah wait till you're my age girlie, you'll be hankering for some "intense adventuresome" trust me.

Meg said...

KP- I think I'm going to add that.

"more about what Meg is looking for: Someone who can sew on a button."

Foxy-I've said it before. I'll say it again. Your kink is okay with me. I guess it wouldn't be quite so alarming if Terry was say, attractive, which he is not. And if anyone is going to be brandishing a whip in the boudoir, it's gonna be me dammit!

Zelmarific said...

OH, honey. That eharmony sounds like a blast. Give him a chance, girl.

Andrew said...

Kink is something you should bring up on, say, the second date--not necessarily in a profile. I'm with ya Meg, steer clear of the overly bizarre profiles.