Boating is fun, we'll show you how!

Just past the Fairgrounds and the Vet School there is a building with the words "United States Power Squadrons" on it. Out front is something that appears to be a ship's mast, but there is never anything hanging on it, you know sails or flags or whatever. Finally, there is a parking lot out front which is always empty.

Now, my more astute readers may have inferred by this point that I have perhaps a more...active...imagination than most. As well, you may not know that I like comic books, more the graphic novel variety, but I like the men in tights kind too.

I keep forgetting to Google United States Power Squadrons. This morning I remembered. I hope I can express the depth of my disappointment in learning they actually deal in safe boating. The whole boat thing? Not really a disguise! I was truly expecting to learn we had secret spandex-clad super heros right here in Raleigh. I was hoping to find on the website a signal or call or something to summon these guys when I witness or suffer an injustice. Alas, the only thing they can help me with is a boating safety course.

For those who don't know, Raleigh is completely and totally landlocked.

I don't know whether to be offended or not.

Do you watch Food Network? Specifically Rescue Chef with Danny Boome? The premise is that he goes to people's homes and helps them overcome a personal (culinary) stumbling block. Or so they say. My take on the premise....he goes into the home of a dippy Barbie doll that fawns and giggles while he flirts. The personal stumbling block? Intelligence. Never have I seen the guest as anyone other than a mid-to late-thirties, perfect size four, long Farrah Fawcett hair, nails just done for TV, asking retarded questions like, "isn't that going to burn in the oven?" Clearly the General Population thinks he is hunky, at least partially due to the Brittish accent. Could this be the second coming of Jaime Oliver? (Personally, I'm a Duff Goldman kind of girl. wink, wink, nudge, nudge.) Seriously, has there ever been a dude on the show? How about an older woman, say, a bit chubby?

This particular episode is featuring what appears to be a yuppie stroller mommy (kid art on wall behind her), Carrie, who apparently isn't holding back the inuendos. Did she just stick her chest out?

I can't watch this. It's too painful.

Ps. I just noticed he's not letting her handle the sharp knives. 'Nuff said.

Be sure to bring only small, unmarked bills.

This week at the Fairgrounds, there is a Seized Jewelry Sale. So, you know, if you, like, need to buy your jewelry back...it'll be at the Fairgrounds.

Your schedule of events

My route to and from work takes me past the NC State Fairgrounds, the site of the now World Famous North Carolina State Fair. Outside the fairgrounds is a giant lighted sign that scrolls through upcoming events there. If you in the Raleigh area, I thought you might like to know there are a number of things to do. Sure we have the Flea Market on Saturdays and Sundays, but did you also know you can get your Sears Contractor Training in the Dorton Arena too? Yes siree, Dorton Arena isn't just for roller derby any more folks!

Upcoming at the fairgrounds THIS WEDNESDAY are the Structural Pesticide Exams in the Martin Building. I'm tempted to just show up and see how I do. I'm guessing not well.

Y'all come now, hear?

Your daily dose

PARANOID? (Not really. Should I be? Why do you ask?)

GOTTIVO? (No, but I wish I did.)

NVRGNVUP (Since this was on a brand new, shiny Cadillac, I have to wonder what he's not giving up on.)

Mr Sandman, bring a dream

Watching people fall asleep on the bus is funny to me. Invariably there's the guy who falls over on his side and out of his seat or the woman who's head nods back and jerks forward. Falling asleep on the bus isn't so funny. I wake up ever two minutes terrified I've missed my stop. The last two days I've fallen asleep on the bus. I've also managed to stay asleep for most of the ride home. Last night I got a total of six hours of sleep. In a row. I have hope that this awful awful insomnia might actually pass in this life time.

More license plates!

PROTOPIA

RUMPOLE

ASA RTR (initials, maybe? that's big here)

MKAWUFLY

AMBSMINI (on a Mini...oh, so that's what they look like!)

IFAKEDIT

REDVINO

OTBSOLNS

Plus a bonus bumper sticker:

"I'm a constitution voter" (Er, as opposed to?)

On the New Girl, Amy Number One, and hand-knitted items.

There's a new girl on the bus. She has mousy reddish brown hair, wears way too much brown and has an unfortunate predilection to Fun Fur scarves. The first week she was on the bus, she was under the impression that Sarge should magically or telepathically know when and where to let her off the bus. Finally this week she started to ring the buzzer like everyone else. This week she has also decided to pick up the bus at my stop rather than her old stop, where ever that was. I really don't care where she gets on the bus, except that she is lacking any ability to mind her own business. Someone coughs on the bus? She has to see who it was. Someone get off, she has to say goodbye to them. She's not special, just annoying. I head to the bus stop around 7 AM. At that time of the day, I'm not so interested in making friends. Especially with the recent insomnia thing, I'm not at my best at 7 AM. She, however, appears to be bright eyed, bushy tailed and chatty at 7 AM. I'd hate to have to choke her with that Fun Fur scarf.

This morning, Chatty Cathy tried to star a conversation with me. I wasn't having it. We got on the bus, I sat in front of Amy Number One, she sat across from her. I pulled out a hat I'm knitting for my friend Cailin (of Five Kids, Two Labs, One Lizard and a Hermit Crab fame). (Oh, by they way, Cai, you're getting a Christmas hat, but that's all I can tell you right now.) Anyway, Amy of course asks me what I'm making...I swear one of these days, I'm going to have to teach her to knit...

Amy: What are you making?
Moi: It's going to be a hat.
Amy: For who?
Me: For my friend Cailin.
Amy: Cailin.
Chatty Cathy: That's a pretty color red.
**Cai, you know you asked for a red hat, so no shocker there**
Me: Yes, it's going to be a Christmas present.

I wasn't talking to her, I was talking to my pal, Amy. Okay, yes, it is a lovely red color, but still...this is an AB conversation so see yourself out lady! (Or however that stupid phrase goes.)

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I also found out today that Floyd's name is not actually Floyd. I've been calling him Floyd for six months and he hasn't corrected me. I feel like a complete dork. I also learned he does yoga. He is definitely my favorite bus driver. I get about 15 minutes to talk to him in the morning. I've learned all about his family, his former job as an EMT. He's a neat guy. I'm going to miss him when they switch routes. I will not miss Special Ed trying to butt into our conversations in the morning.

New routes and schedules are posted!

Go here to see the changes Triangle Transit has made to their routes and schedules effective December 1.

I am happy to report this will not affect my commute negatively, and it looks like I might get a few extra minutes in the morning. Woo hoo! I am as equally happy to report that a new Blue Urban Bikes hub will be stationed at the new Transfer Center.

Two thumbs up to the staff of the Triangle Transit Group for doing a bang up job. I have no doubt this will be a seemless transition. Their planning group had to recalculate all of the time tables, create new routes, move existing routes and somehow keep everyone happy. What a daunting task.

And now we resume your regularly scheduled programming

Another accident? This one was involved a school bus. A friend of mine was on the bus and I believe everyone was okay. Thankfully.